替何韻詩改一下英文。 我剛出來做事的時候教過兩年英文，因為覺得自己的英文不好，不想誤人子弟所以放棄這個事業了。 何韻詩的英文公開信又撩起了我改英文的興趣哈哈哈哈哈哈。況且毛孟靜在網誌上批評Lancôme的聲明寫得不好，所以我也借何小姐的文章發揮一下了。 第一句已經有些問題。她說Lancôme取消演唱會“...first to draw a line between me and the brand, then abruptly cancelling the upcoming musical performance for 'safety reasons'.”。我覺得cancelling應該用cancel好一些，因為前面是“to draw”，後面應該也用“to”的。

部分遣詞用字未如理想

第二段“This is about those precious universal values that every individual yearn for.”，“yearns”會不會正確一點呢？ 同一段“Individuals, corporations, and society all become victims, everyone is deeply and gravely affected.”，“everyone is deeply and gravely affected” 是完整的句子，因此之前用句號或加個and會好一點吧。 第三段“I say this with respect, but corporations do have social responsibility...”我認為應該是“social responsibilities”。因為如果某字是單數的話前面應該有一個“a”的。 同段的“...in addition to pursuing profits”，“pursuing profits”前面應該有一個“the”，後面應該加一個“of”，即“the pursuing of profits”或者“the pursuit of profits”。 也是同一段“To my understanding, the decision was pressured by the brand’s headquarters in France,...”我認為Lancôme法國總部施壓的對象，應該是香港的分部，而不是那個決定本身，因此我會說“the Hong Kong office made that decision under pressure from the brand's headquarters in France."。 下一段“Should we stop self-censoring out of fear and start respecting ourselves and others based on good honest work---we could all be freer.”。很奇怪。第一如果“we could all be freer”前面用連字號hyphen的話，前面的句子變成不完整了。她用“Should”而不是If 也是非常奇怪的。我認為正確應該是“If we could stop to self-censor and start to respect ourselves and others, and base our respect on good, honest work, we should all be freer.” 會不會好些呢？ 最後“Because the reality is that if we opt to stay mute and do nothing, these would all be stripped away from us before we notice.” “these”說一些東西，可是她又沒有交待這些是甚麼東西。她的意思是我們會被「脫」了一些東西，可是又沒有說是被脫了甚麼？衣服？

AKA多用於警方尋罪犯

最後不得不提的是何說自己「又名為」HOCC，a.k.a HOCC。我們看看AKA的意思吧。根據網上字典aka (also known as)是：An abbreviation meaning “also known as.” It is primarily used by law enforcement officials to specify an alias: “John Smith, aka Jonathan Jones.” Note: The abbreviation, which also appears as AKA and a.k.a., is often used figuratively and facetiously: “my cousin, aka the worst gossip in the neighborhood.” 換句話說，基本上是警方尋找罪犯的時候用的詞，因為很多罪犯是以不同的名字出現的因此他們要提醒大眾(你可能會說她沒有甚麼不對啊)注意他們的其他名字。字典說不是罪犯也可以用，但是一般都是調侃。不正經的時候才用的。那你認為她用 a.k.a 的時候是那一種的心態呢？ 歡迎毛孟靜提供一下意見…… 圖：BBC視頻截圖 http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-36466680

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